Good Catholic Boy
by Heavenly Pearl
Summary: Jean-Jacques Leroy always considered himself a good Catholic boy, but when he and Isabella give into temptation, his life is changed forever.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Jean-Jacques Leroy considered himself, above all, a good Catholic boy.

He faithfully attended Mass every Sunday (at least when he was at home in Toronto – he usually didn't have time during weekend competitions). He almost never swore (unless he fell on a jump or lost a competition or stubbed his toe, but even then, he only did it in Quebecois, and that didn't count in a convoluted way that only made sense in his head). He performed many works of charity during his almost non-existent free time and tried his best to love his neighbors (although some of the skaters he met on the circuit made it very hard to do so at times). He and his fiancée had even made a vow to save themselves for marriage.

But sometimes JJ really, really, _really_ wanted to be bad.

Especially when Isabella straddled his lap on the couch and nibbled on his earlobe, her nimble fingers undoing the tiny buttons of his shirt.

"_Crisse de tabernacle_, Bella!"

The evening had started innocently enough. Since it was Valentine's Day, they had gone out for a romantic dinner, then JJ had invited her over to his apartment to watch a movie – _only_ to watch a movie. He wasn't a "Netflix and chill" kind of guy, after all. JJ barely even knew what that meant, having picked up the term from one of Christophe Giacometti's tweets, but considering the Swiss skater's reputation, it wasn't hard to pick up the innuendo behind the slang, especially when accompanied by an eggplant emoji.

The movie, however, turned out to be a dud, and by the midway point, they had abandoned all pretense of actually watching it, finding making out a much more entertaining way to pass the time.

They seemed to do that a lot lately, especially ever since JJ moved out of his family home over the summer – he loved his parents/coaches, but he needed _some_ time to himself – and into his own apartment near the rink where he trained. No longer having to worry about somebody walking in on them at an inopportune moment allowed them the freedom to push the boundaries of their sexuality – both a blessing and a curse. While they had yet to completely step over the line, he and Isabella had come close to breaking their vow several times over the past few months, and JJ feared it wouldn't be long before they finally gave into forbidden desires.

It didn't help matters that in spite of the freezing February weather outside, Isabella had decided to wear the shortest skirt she owned, the fabric riding dangerously up her thighs. Swallowing hard, JJ removed his hands from her legs and slid them up the back of her red cashmere sweater until he found her bra clasp. As long as he kept his attention above Isabella's waist, he would be okay.

Probably.

JJ fumbled with the hooks for a few moments, muttering swears in Quebecois under his breath until he managed to release her breasts from their lacy confines. He then moved his hands to her front, Isabella letting out a sharp gasp as his fingers brushed against her rock-hard nipples. Smiling, he rolled her nipples between his thumb and pointer finger, enjoying the faint flush that began coloring her pale cheeks.

"Do you want to see?" she asked, JJ's eyes widening in surprise.

Though Isabella allowed him to feel her up on occasion, it was always underneath her clothes. He could touch, but not look – that was the rule, no matter how much he begged. (And he was ashamed to admit he had begged quite a lot until he realized the futility of it.)

"I thought you said not until our wedding night."

"I know, but today _is_ Valentine's Day," she cooed, running her fingers through his hair. "My king deserves a little present for being so good. So, do you wanna see?"

She didn't even have to ask; the answer was obvious to anybody with half a brain. Still, JJ didn't want to come across as too eager. He pulled his hands out from underneath her sweater and threw his arms over the top of the couch. "Sure, if you want to show me."

Her blood-red lips curved into a knowing smirk as she rose up on her knees and slowly lifted up the hem of her sweater.

JJ inhaled a deep breath, his fingers digging into soft leather. He had often dreamed of what her breasts might look like, but they were even more spectacular than he imagined – small, but perky, her dark areola a sharp contrast to her otherwise pale skin tone.

"God, you are beautiful," he murmured before taking a nipple in between his lips, his hands moving back to her waist.

Isabella moaned as he teased her with his tongue, flicking and swirling it over the tip. "A-Ah, JJ, this wasn't a part of the deal," she said, though she made no attempt to push him away. In fact, she buried the fingers of one hand in his hair, keeping his head in place, and tugged at his roots as he continued to suckle her breast.

Almost as if they had a mind of their own, his hands found their way underneath her black skirt, ignoring his earlier resolve to keep things above the belt.

JJ expected to come across a pair of panties, yet as he lightly squeezed her butt cheeks, all he touched was bare flesh. A thong – or was she going commando? She didn't strike him as the type, but the thought of Isabella not wearing any underwear at all made the growing bulge in his pants more uncomfortable and even harder to ignore.

Releasing her nipple, JJ looked up at Isabella through half-lidded eyes. "I want to make love to you, Bella," he said, never desiring her more.

"Only a few more months, babe," she said, pulling her sweater back down as she trailed kisses against his jawline. "Just a few more months, and I will be yours, completely…"

"No, tonight."

Stopping what she was doing, Isabella pulled back. "Wait, are you serious?"

He didn't answer, his hands skimming over her hips to in between her spread legs. A soft gasp escaped Isabella's lips as his fingertips grazed against her most private area. She was, in fact, wearing a thong, but the fabric was damp, almost soaked through with her arousal – proof that she wanted him just as much as he wanted her.

"Can I touch you?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

Biting down on her bottom lip, Isabella nodded her consent and shifted her position to give him better access, her hands on his shoulders.

JJ tugged her thong aside and, after a moment of hesitation, ran a finger along her slit, causing Isabella's breath to hitch at the back of her throat. She was hairless down there, a fact that surprised him – although considering how fastidious she usually was about her appearance, perhaps he shouldn't have been.

"Please, JJ…." she whimpered.

He wavered once again, a voice in the back of his mind telling him he was going too far, that he needed to stop before they did something he knew they would come to regret. A louder, more insistent voice urged him onward, however, and he could no longer resist the temptation, slipping his pointer finger in between her slick folds. She was warm and wet, a sensation that seemed strange at first but he quickly came to enjoy as he began exploring her sex.

"Does it feel good?" he asked, only vaguely aware of what he was doing. Sex education at the Catholic school he attended only went over the basics of intercourse, and while he had picked up a few things here and there – from movies, from magazines, from Twitter (again, mostly Christophe's fault, not that JJ had much use for the anything Chris had to say on the topic, not being into guys and all – well, aside from that one confusing dream about kissing Otabek Altin back in high school, but that didn't count) – he had no practical experience in such matters.

Isabella's right hand dropped from his shoulder, disappearing underneath her skirt to guide his finger to the spot she most wanted him to touch. "There," she said, letting out a low moan as he began rubbing the pad of his fingertip over the small nub she directed him toward. "Not so fast, babe. It's not a race."

JJ adjusted his speed. "Better?"

She nodded, bringing her hand back up to his shoulder. "Much."

He continued what he was doing, keeping a steady rhythm, and before long, Isabella's breathing had become heavy pants, her sharp fingernails digging into his shoulders. JJ smirked, pleased with himself. Despite his lack of experience, it seemed he was a natural – as he was with most things he tried, to be honest.

"Who's the king, baby?"

Face flushed, Isabella closed her eyes. "Ah...y-you…ah…you are!" she gasped before her body shuddered in ecstasy.

JJ loved watching her orgasm, knowing he was the one who brought her such pleasure. She was so incredibly beautiful, even with her face scrunched up and her mouth hanging open. Not for the first time, he marveled at the fact that a girl like her would his for the rest of their earthly lives.

"So, you liked that?" he asked, withdrawing his finger once her muscles finally stopped convulsing around it.

Isabella opened her eyes and gave him a shy smile. "Yeah. You were good, JJ." She slid her hands down his bare chest. "Real good. You always know how to treat me right," she said, reaching for the fly of his jeans. "Now, it's my turn."

She started to pull down his zipper until JJ grabbed her wrists, preventing her from going any further.

Regarding him with a questioning gaze, she asked, "Don't you want to?"

He sighed, releasing his hold on her and clenching his hands into tight fists.

That wasn't the issue. He wanted nothing more than to gather Isabella in his arms, carry her to his bed, and make love to her, but the voice from earlier was back, stronger than before and practically screaming at him to stop. "Maybe we shouldn't."

"But you were –"

"I know."

"Oh…okay." Isabella climbed off his lap, shifting her thong back in place before reaching behind her back to re-clasp her bra. "I should probably be heading home, anyway. You know how Daddy gets when I stay out too late," she said, fiddling with her earlobe. "Do you see an earring anywhere?"

Standing up as well, JJ checked in between the couch cushions for the missing hoop. "I don't see it. Are you sure you still had it on when we arrived? You may have lost it at the restaurant."

"Oh, I hope not. Maybe it fell on the floor?"

She dropped down on her hands and knees and searched underneath the couch, the position giving JJ an unintentional peep up her short skirt. Though he quickly glanced away, it wasn't fast enough to prevent him from catching a flash of bare flesh. His arousal, which had begun to fade without stimulation, came back in full force.

"Found it!" Isabella said, rising back to her feet. "I have no idea how it – JJ?"

Embracing her from behind, JJ kissed her shoulder. "Stay," he murmured into the cashmere fabric.

"A-Are you sure?"

To be honest, he wasn't. The battle between his hormones and his conscious kept raging inside him like a storm, a war he was growing increasingly weary of fighting every time he touched Isabella.

Why had they decided to wait until June to get married? It seemed a good idea at the time. After all, it was the off-season for most skaters, and Isabella had always dreamed of being a June bride, so when the church happened to have an opening on the first Saturday after a sudden cancellation, they had jumped on it without much discussion.

It was only six more months, JJ had reasoned back in December, and better than his original idea of waiting until after he won the World Championships to even start planning the wedding, more than likely pushing the date even further back. Not that he didn't plan to win gold in Helsinki, but after all the pressure he had put himself under at the Grand Prix Final, Isabella had been right to insist on him giving up on that condition for their marriage.

Six months was nothing. He'd been dating Isabella since high school and had managed to keep it in his pants for over three years. He could hold out for a few more months, no problem.

"JJ?" Isabella turned around, wrapping her arms around his neck. "What do you want to do?" she asked. "It's your decision. I'm ready if you are."

His eyes widened. "You are?"

"I love you, JJ," she said, brushing her lips against his before bringing her mouth to his ear. "Come, let me show you how much."

She pulled back and offered her hand, JJ staring down at it as he inhaled a deep breath. He knew what he wanted to do.

Taking her hand, he followed Isabella to his bedroom, closing the door behind him.

God would forgive him just this once…

…right?

DISCLAIMER: _Yuri! On Ice_ doesn't belong to me.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of my first _YOI _multi-part, which was actually _supposed_ to be a short one-shot but just kept ballooning. Heh. Anyway, I think it'll clock in at about six chapters, and I'm hoping to update once a week.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

A lone person clapped after JJ finished a clean run-through of his short program at practice. Looking around for the source of the applause, a huge smile crossed his face when he spotted Isabella standing behind the boards.

"Five minutes?" he asked his mother, who was also one of his coaches.

She affectionately rolled her eyes and handed him his water bottle. "Go ahead. We'll work on your lutz next."

"Thanks, _Maman_."

After grabbing a towel to wipe the sweat off his face, he skated to where Isabella was standing and kissed her chastely on the cheek. "Hey, babe, what are you doing here?" he asked. "I thought you had that seminar to attend this afternoon."

"My professor came down with the flu, so she rescheduled for next week." Isabella tucked a strand of her dark hair behind her ear, her voice lowering as she leaned closer toward him. "Um, JJ, we really need to talk. Can we go somewhere more private?"

JJ twisted the cap off his water bottle and took a swig, wiping his mouth with his sleeve. "Something wrong?"

After a moment of hesitation, she shook her head. "Never mind. Not right now; it can wait. You need to focus on practice. Worlds are coming up, right?"

"Yeah." He winked and shot off his trademark JJ gesture. "This time, I'm bringing home the gold, baby." After his embarrassing performance at the Grand Prix Final and only winning silver by less than a point behind Yuuri Katsuki at Four Continents a few weeks ago, he was more determined than ever to end his season on top of the World podium.

Isabella smiled. "I know you will."

"In the meantime, you should go home." Frowning, he placed his hand against her forehead. "You're looking kind of pale, and I think you might be running a fever."

"You've been skating for hours in a freezing cold ice rink, JJ. Of course I'm going to feel warm in comparison."

"Still, you might be coming down with the flu as well."

From center ice, his father – and other coach – shouted for him. "Hey, JJ, say goodbye to Bella and get back to work. We only have a couple of days left to practice before we leave for Helsinki."

"Coming, _Papa_!" he called out before turning his attention back to Isabella. "I'll call you later," he promised, squeezing her gloved hand. "So try to get some rest, okay?"

She nodded. "Okay. Good luck with the rest of practice. Love you."

"Love you, too, babe."

JJ didn't want to risk getting sick before the biggest competition of the season if it turned out she did have the flu, so he settled for blowing her a kiss and waving before skating back over to his parents to resume practice.

* * *

Upon arriving at the door to his apartment later that afternoon, JJ sighed and rolled his shoulders. It had been a bit of a rough practice after Isabella left the rink, and he looked forward to taking a nice long soak in the bath to soothe his aching muscles.

He pulled his key out of his pocket and reached for the doorknob, frowning when it turned easily in his hand. JJ knew he had locked it when he left that morning, which meant Isabella must had come over. He had given her a copy of his key in case of emergencies, but it wasn't like her to visit without calling first.

Opening the door, he was greeted by the sound of Isabella's soft sobs.

"Bella!" He dropped his duffel bag by the door and immediately fell to his knees in front of her. "What's wrong?"

She shook her head. "No, it's nothing," she said, wiping at her tears with the sleeves of her – actually, his – cardigan. "I'm fine, I'm fine."

"No, you're not." JJ grabbed a tissue from the box on the end table and moved to sit beside her on the couch, wrapping his arm around her trembling shoulders. "Here."

"Oh, J.J…."

Another sob shook through her as she accepted the offered tissue, and JJ pulled her closer, letting Isabella bury her face in his shoulder. He waited until her cries had subsided before asking again what was wrong.

"Did something happen? Did somebody…hurt you?"

If some creep had done something to her…

"No, it's nothing like that." Isabella sat back up, sniffling and dabbing away the last of her tears with the tissue. "I-I don't want to talk about it right now. You're leaving for Worlds in a few days. You should be focusing on that."

JJ frowned. She had said the same thing at the rink, hadn't she? "But I won't be able to focus if I'm worried about you."

"I'll be fine, really," she said, forcing a small smile as she ran her fingers through his short hair. "I should go. I don't know why I came over here anyway."

"Bella, wait –"

He reached for her hand as Isabella stood to leave, but without warning, she abruptly covered her mouth and sprinted to the powder room. She was in such a hurry that she didn't even close the door behind her, the sound of her retching echoing into the living room. Concerned, JJ followed after her, standing in the doorway as she continued to hurl.

"So I was right," he said, crossing his arms as he leaned against the frame. "You do have the flu."

Isabella turned her head toward his voice. "It's not the flu! It's mo—" She threw up again, hugging the toilet bowl.

"If it's not the flu, then –"

That was when he first noticed the white stick laying on the counter beside the sink.

JJ entered the powder room and picked up the stick with a shaking hand, sucking in a sharp breath. He didn't know exactly what the two pink lines meant, but he was smart enough to connect the dots.

"Oh, Bella…"

Isabella finally stopped vomiting and rose back to her feet, wordlessly taking the pregnancy test from JJ's hand and tossing it in the waste basket before brushing past him in order to rinse her mouth out at the sink.

"So, yeah, I'm pregnant," she said, confirming his suspicions after wiping her mouth with the hand towel hanging on the wall.

_Pregnant_.

"But it was just that one time…" Out of guilt, he hadn't touched her in any remotely sexual way since that night, recommitting himself to the vow he had broken in atonement of his sin.

"One time is all it takes, babe." Isabella let out a heavy sigh, staring at her reflection in the mirror. "And we didn't use protection."

"Right…"

Of course they hadn't used protection. He hadn't planned to lose his virginity on Valentine's Day. It just…happened. In hindsight, he should have at least pulled out before he ejaculated, but it had felt so _good_ inside her, and neither of them had given much thought to the possible consequences of their actions, too overwhelmed by hormones and over three years of sexual frustration.

"JJ, what are we going to do?" she asked, turning around to truly face him for the first time since she told him the news.

Without a word, JJ exited the tiny powder room, finding it suddenly claustrophobic, and began pacing around the living room. What _were_ they going to do? That was a good question. They always planned to have a family – one day in the distant future when he had retired from competitive skating and Isabella had finished law school – but never so soon.

And what would people say when they found out? Groaning, JJ dragged a hand through his hair. It was no secret that he and Isabella had planned to save themselves for marriage; he didn't exactly shout it from the rooftops, but he had been open about it in interviews whenever the subject of his faith came up, hoping to be a role model for young people struggling to hold true to their values and beliefs in an oversexed society.

Ha, role model! Some role model he turned out to be.

"JJ?"

He popped open the top two buttons of his shirt, only vaguely aware that Isabella had joined him in the living room. Had she turned up the thermostat? The apartment felt like a sauna…

"We'll move up the wedding," he said, thinking aloud. "You're only a few weeks along, right? If we get married fast enough, we can just pretend the baby is premature when it's born."

"You can't just snap and magically move up a wedding. Do you realize how much planning has already gone into everything?" Isabella asked, counting on her fingers. "The venue, the caterers, the florist, the band… Not to mention we have guests flying in from all over the world. We can't expect them to change their travel plans last minute."

He supposed she had a point… "Okay, so we'll elope, say we wanted a private ceremony just for the two of us. Then we can get married again in June like we planned, with all our family and friends in attendance."

Again, she shot down the idea. "I don't think that's going to fool anybody. Everybody will know the real reason when they find out about the baby."

"Then what brilliant suggestions do you have?" he snapped, rounding on her. Realizing how he sounded, JJ's face softened, and he sighed, sitting down on the couch. "Sorry. This is just a lot to take in," he said, clutching at the sudden tightness in his chest.

"Are you feeling okay?"

He wasn't sure. It was becoming difficult to breathe, and beads of sweat rolled down his face and into his eyes. "Can you turn down the temperature?" he asked in between gasps. "It's so hot in here!"

"JJ, honey, I think you're having a panic attack," Isabella said, sounding far away despite the fact that she was sitting right beside him, squeezing his hand. "Remember your breathing exercises?"

Breathing exercises? JJ tightly closed his eyes, struggling to focus. He remembered going to see a psychologist a few days after he returned home from the Grand Prix Final at his parents' and Isabella's insistence, but he hadn't paid much attention to anything the quack had to say, and he certainly didn't have an anxiety disorder or whatever imaginary disease he was diagnosed with. What happened at the Final was a one-time thing, nothing to worry about.

Or so he thought...

"Listen to me and do what I say," Isabella said, her voice calm and soothing. "Can you do that for me?"

He nodded, his erratic breathing making it almost impossible for him to talk.

"Okay, inhale through your nose… 1, 2, 3, 4… Hold it… 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7… Now, exhale… 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8… Again, inhale… 1, 2, 3, 4… Hold it…"

She coached him through the exercise several more times. By the fifth or sixth round, JJ no longer felt like he was going to die, his breathing under control. "I'm sorry," he said, slumping forward, head in his hands.

"Hey, it's okay." Isabella kissed his temple and began rubbing his back in comfort. "I'm freaked out, too."

JJ sighed.

She was right. The news of her pregnancy had thrown him for a loop, but he couldn't even begin to imagine how terrifying it must have felt for her to learn that a baby was growing inside of her. How long had she suspected? He assumed she had taken the pregnancy test after she visited him at the rink, but she must have been so frightened… He wished he hadn't brushed her off, assuming that whatever she wanted to talk about wasn't that important. He should have been there for her, supporting her like she always supported him.

He reached for Isabella's free hand, bringing it to his mouth for a kiss. "I'm sorry," he apologized again. "How are you feeling? Is there anything I can do?"

"I'm still a little nauseous," she admitted. "Do you have any ginger ale?"

He nodded. Isabella enjoyed drinking ginger ale even when he wasn't pregnant, so he usually kept some on hand for the times she visited. "I'll get you a can."

JJ went to the kitchen and grabbed a can of ginger ale from the pantry, pouring it into a glass before heading back out, only to find Isabella missing. A few seconds later, she emerged from the powder room once again, clutching her stomach as she made her way back to the couch.

"Whoever decided to call it 'morning sickness' must have had a terrible sense of humor," she groaned. "I've been throwing up all day."

Joining her on the couch, JJ handed her the glass of ginger ale. "Here, maybe this will help," he said. "You know, when _Maman_ was pregnant with my brother and sister, eating crackers really seemed to help with her morning sickness."

She smiled wanly. "Thanks. I'll keep that in mind."

"How long have you been sick?"

"Since yesterday, after I got home from school. At first, I thought it was just something I ate during lunch, but then this morning I realized I hadn't gotten my period..." She took a sip of her drink and frowned, twirling the glass in her hands. "God, I wish it was just food poisoning."

So did he. "How accurate are those tests?" he asked. "It could be a false-positive, right? Or maybe you misread the instructions…"

"I doubt it."

"Yeah, I know." It was just tough to face the reality. JJ leaned back against the cushions and craned his neck to look up at the ceiling. "What are we going to do?" he asked, repeating Isabella's earlier question.

She set her glass down on the coffee table and curled up against him, neither of them saying anything for what seemed like an eternity until Isabella finally broke the silence.

"I think we should just tell everybody the truth."

"The truth?" JJ sat back up, eyes widening. "Bella, we can't do that. People know we were saving ourselves for marriage. If they find out you're preg—"

"It's better than living a lie, isn't it?" she asked, interrupting him. "Yeah, we made a mistake, but nobody's perfect. Wasn't your mother already pregnant with you when your parents got married?

"Well, yes, but –"

"And my mother won't mind...much. She's been looking forward to becoming a grandmother. Maybe she won't expect it to happen quite so soon, and she'll wish it was under better circumstances, but she'll be happy, I think, once she gets over the initial shock."

He was almost afraid to ask, but… "And your father?"

"Oh, he's going to kill you when he finds out."

JJ let out a loud groan, covering his face with his hands as he fell once again against the cushions.

"I'm joking, I'm joking, sweetheart," she said, pulling his hands away. "Daddy will be angry at first, but he'll get over it…probably."

"Bella, you're not making me feel better." He reached up and caressed her cheek. "Are you sure you don't want to elope?"

"The truth will come out eventually. It always does. We might as well admit to it and take responsibility for our actions," she said. "Besides, I only want to get married one time, in front of God and all our friends and family. I may have to buy a new dress, but there's no reason anything else has to change just because I'm pregnant."

"But everything will change," he reminded her. "We're going to be _parents_."

"We are, aren't we?" Sighing, she brought one of her hands down to her still flat stomach, resting her head on his shoulder. "JJ, we can do this, right?" she asked in a small voice, so different from her usual confident self. "We're still so young, and we're both at university, and you're always busy with training and competitions and, well, everything…"

JJ wrapped an arm around her shoulder and kissed the top of her head. "We'll make it work, babe," he said, placing his hand on top of hers on her abdomen. "I promise."

He wasn't quite sure how at the moment, but he had to trust that God wouldn't give them more than they could handle.

DISCLAIMER: _Yuri! On Ice_ doesn't belong to me.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Thanks for reading! The next chapter will be up next weekend. Happy Easter and Passover to all who celebrate!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

The audience jumped to their feet in a thunderous ovation, cheering "JJ is the King" as he bowed in gratitude at the center of the ice.

JJ had just finished performing his free skate, closing out the men's event at the 2017 World Championships. He had skated almost perfectly; his only major mistake was popping an easy triple loop into a double. JJ hated popping jumps almost more than anything – it was better to at least rotate and fall than to pop – but he had a five point cushion over Yuuri Katsuki and Yuri Plisetsky in the short program going into the free. With any luck, it would be enough to keep him in the lead overall.

After grabbing a teddy bear dressed in a tiny replica of his purple short program costume from the avalanche of gifts thrown out on the ice, JJ skated over to the Kiss and Cry to meet his parents. "The loop – I know, I know," he said, taking his skate guards from his mother and placing them over his blades as he stepped off the ice. "I rushed the take-off. I got too excited."

"It's good to be excited, but you have to keep your head to the end, son." His father handed him a bottle of water as the three of them sat down on the bench, JJ in the middle. "It really was a fantastic skate, though. I'm proud that you didn't let the mistake get to you. You'll definitely make the podium."

"But do you think it'll be enough for gold?"

"We'll have to see what the judges think," his mother said. "It's going to be a close call, but it might just be."

Replays of his jumps began playing on the jumbotron above the ice. Seeing his popped loop, JJ grimaced, then shrugged his shoulders as he took a large swig from his water bottle. There was nothing he could do about it now, and if he had learned anything over the past week, it was that there were more important things in life than winning or losing a figure skating competition – although he still really, really wanted to win.

He and Isabella had broken the news of her pregnancy to their respective families at his "good luck" dinner the night before he left for Helsinki, JJ not wanting the stress of keeping such a huge secret while competing at the most important competition of the year. They had reacted almost exactly how Isabella had predicted. His parents were surprised, but supportive, understanding how things sometimes happened in spite of the best intentions, and her mother was thrilled once the news finally sunk in, even getting into a spirited discussion about baby names with his younger sister. (They decided on Theodore for a boy and Charlotte for a girl, which meant those two names instantly jumped straight to the top of JJ's veto list, just on principle – it was his and Isabella's baby to name, not theirs! Besides, he always rather liked the idea of a junior, although Isabella remained unconvinced.) As for Isabella's father… Well, needless to say, JJ had never been so eager to leave the country for an international competition.

He hoped by the time he returned to Toronto, Mr. Yang had calmed down a little. The last time he spoke to Isabella, she informed him that her father had stopped referring to him as "the bastard who knocked up my baby girl", calling him "that no-good skater guy" instead, so…progress? Perhaps by the wedding he would be back on first name basis.

Thinking of Isabella, JJ searched for the camera focused on the Kiss and Cry. Due to her busy class schedule, Isabella had been unable to accompany him to Helsinki, and he missed her terribly. He knew without a doubt, however, that at that very moment, she was sitting in front of her laptop with a cup of hot chocolate, streaming the competition live and cheering for him from afar.

"I love you, Bella!" he called out, making a cutesy heart sign with his fingers. "Thank you to my beautiful queen and all the fans, especially the JJ Girls! I really felt the love out there today."

But why was it taking so long for his scores to come up? Were some of his jumps under review? With the height he achieved on his jumps, it was rare for him to receive any under-rotations, and he wasn't prone to edge calls…

"You may have lost some spin levels," his mother said in response to his unasked question.

"Yeah, maybe." JJ was a great spinner, but sometimes when he was too into a performance, he made silly mistakes that led to him missing out on all level fours, unlike Yuri Plisetsky, the leader for the moment who was currently shooting daggers with his eyes at the man shoving a camera in his face. If he lost the gold due to a spin, of all things… "How much do I need again?"

"The scores, please, for Jean-Jacques Leroy of Canada," the announcer said before his mother could answer.

His heart pounding in his chest, JJ grabbed his mother's hand, his father wrapping an arm around his shoulder. Silently, he closed his eyes and prayed that he had done enough.

"His free skate score is 209.69."

JJ nodded. Not enough to win the free skate; he already knew that. The loop had cost him. But the total score… As the crowd erupted into deafening cheers, drowning out the announcer's voice, JJ squinted at the leaderboard and quickly did the math in his head.

"You did it, JJ," his father whispered in his ear, shaking him. "You did it!"

On the other side of him, his mother yanked off her glasses and burst into happy tears, but JJ didn't allow himself to truly believe it until he saw the final leaderboard with his own two eyes.

Yuuri Katsuki won bronze.

Yuri Plisetsky had to settle for the silver.

And he, Jean-Jacques Leroy, had just become the new World Champion.

"YES!" he roared at the top of his lungs, jumping up from the bench and performing his trademark "double Js". "I AM the king! That's how you win, JJ style!"

* * *

After that, everything was a euphoric blur.

Though the first thing JJ wanted to do was call Isabella and celebrate his victory, he immediately got pulled away to do post-competition interviews for CBC and NBC. He was so excited about winning that he had no idea what he ended up saying on air, but at least he got some laughs out of the interviewers.

Next came the medal ceremony, the moment he had dreamed of since he was a little kid and played "Podium" with one of the medals he had "borrowed" from his parents' extensive collection. No words could describe how it felt standing on top of the World podium for real, the gold medal around his neck and the Canadian flag hanging above him from the rafters. As JJ sang along to "O, Canada", unexpected tears leaked from his eyes, which he wiped away with the handkerchief Yuuri discretely handed him from the lowest step.

Even the mandatory drug testing did little to lessen JJ's good mood. He knew he was clean after all, although one could be forgiven for thinking he was high on _something_ by the way he was acting.

His high came crashing down with a thud, however, when his mother informed him that it was time for the press conference.

In his jubilation over his win, JJ had forgotten all about it, his stomach churning as he and his mother headed to the room where the press conference was being held. His father had already gone ahead, having gotten caught up in a conversation with Yakov Feltsman about off-ice training.

"Do I have to go, _Maman_?" he asked, well aware that he sounded more like a ten-year-old child instead of a nineteen-year-old husband-and-father-to-be.

"Why? Are you not feeling well?" Concerned, she stopped him in the middle of the corridor and brought a hand to his forehead. "Well, you're not running a fever…"

"No. I…" He glanced away and sighed. "I just don't feel like going."

"Don't be silly, JJ! You love press conferences."

He did, usually. Most skaters considered them a necessary evil, but JJ loved talking about his skating to anybody and everybody who would listen, and the press ate it up, knowing they could usually get some great quotes from him. This time, however…

"Is this about Bella?" she asked, lowering her voice in case anyone was eavesdropping on their conversation. "Oh, sweetie, your father and I are the only ones here who know. Nobody will be asking you questions about it unless you bring it up first."

"I know, but –"

She smiled, pressing a hand against his cheek in motherly affection. "It'll be okay. Today, you are the best in the world. You should enjoy your moment in the spotlight. You deserve it."

Nodding, JJ forced a grin to his face as they continued on to the press room, which was almost filled to capacity with journalists from all over the world. The other two medalists, Yuri and Yuuri, were already sitting at the table set up in front of the room.

"About time the so-called 'king' showed up," Yuri sneered when JJ joined them, taking a seat in the empty chair in between them. "The press conference is about –" He paused, giving JJ a strange look that might have passed for concern if it was anybody else. "Hey, you okay? You look like you're going to puke."

Great, even the Russian punk was worried about him... "Never been better!" JJ insisted in his usual boisterous voice, patting both of them hard on the back.

Yuuri, who had been taking a sip of water at the time, sputtered and coughed.

"Oops, sorry about that."

"O-Oh, no, it's fine," Yuuri said, smiling. "Congratulations once again on winning, by the way. I saw your skate. It was a great performance."

"Thanks."

JJ ignored the bewildered look that passed between his fellow medalists, Yuri shrugging his shoulders before taking out his phone.

After the photographers got a chance to take some group shots of the medalists and a couple more journalists straggled in last minute, the press conference finally began. As always, the first few questions were the easy ones.

_How does it feel to be on the podium? _

_ What were you thinking when you stepped onto the ice? _

_ Were you satisfied with your performance? _

Those were the questions asked at almost every press conference, and JJ barely had to think to answer them, even managing to give his responses some of his usual "JJ style" flair despite his increasing dread of what was to come.

But then...

"What are your goals for the upcoming Olympic season?" a Japanese reporter by the name of Mr. Morooka asked of all three of the medalists.

Yuuri answered first. "I want to keep growing as a skater. With Viktor by my side this past season, I've been able to accomplish more than I ever thought possible, but somehow I feel I have yet to reach my full potential. I can do better, win more. Of course, with Viktor coming back to compete next season, I'll have to work even harder, but I'm aiming to win gold at the Grand Prix Final, the Olympics, and Worlds, as well as defend my Four Continents title."

Nodding, Mr. Morooka said something to Yuuri in Japanese that JJ couldn't understand – he was probably wishing Yuuri luck as JJ recognized the word "Ganbatte!" – before turning the question over to the other Yuri. "And you, Mr. Plisetsky?"

"I'm gonna win Olympic gold, obviously," Yuri declared with a dismissive wave of his hand. "I'm also working to add more difficult quads to my programs. The lutz wasn't ready to debut here, but I'm starting to land it consistently in practice."

JJ was certain Yuri mentioned that last part solely to psych him out, knowing that the quad lutz was JJ's favorite jump.

It worked, a little, although JJ wondered how long he would be able to keep that consistency. He noticed when they were taking pictures that Yuri had grown at least an inch – maybe even more – since they last competed against each other in December, the growth spurt the likely reason behind his uncharacteristic stumble out of the axel in the short program. He felt kind of sorry for the kid; talk about bad timing with the Olympics less than a year away.

"We'll be looking forward to seeing that," Mr. Morooka said before moving on to JJ. "Mr. Leroy, with your win here at Worlds, you're now one of the front-runners for Olympic gold, but I'm sure you would also love redemption at the Grand Prix Final, given how the last Final went for you. Are you looking forward to next season's Grand Prix series?"

"I'm…uh…taking the next Grand Prix season off, actually," he announced to a buzz of murmurs from the gathered journalists.

After all, next season was the Olympic season, the most important time of an elite skater's career. It was almost unheard of to skip the Grand Prix right before the Olympics unless a skater was dealing with an injury.

JJ hadn't even informed his parents of the decision he and Isabella had come to the night before he left Toronto. Glancing over at the spot off to the side where the coaches stood, he saw them wearing identical stunned looks, Viktor Nikiforov and Yakov Feltsman both trying to question them at the same time in a mix of French and English. He mouthed the words, "I'm sorry," before turning his attention to a Canadian reporter he knew quite well from all the interviews she had conducted with him over the years.

"This is quite the surprising announcement, JJ," Stacey said. "Have you been dealing with an injury?"

JJ smiled. "No, I've never felt in better shape in my life, and I look forward to coming back in the second half of the season to defend my Canadian and World titles and hopefully stand on top of the Olympic podium."

Another journalist – American, he thought – raised his hand and stood up. "Does your decision have anything to do with what happened at the Grand Prix Final last December?"

"Absolutely not. That's all in the past. I admit that the Final was a low point in my skating career, but I really learned a lot from it, and now I'm sitting before you as the new World Champion."

"Then is it because you fear competing against the returning Viktor Nikiforov before the Olympics and ruining your upward momentum?" a Russian reporter asked in heavily accented English, looking almost gleeful at the thought.

"I can't wait to compete against Viktor again," JJ said, knowing better than to take the bait. "I've been a huge fan of his since I was a kid, and everybody knows he's one of the greatest skaters who ever lived. But there's a new king in town now, so if he wants to win another gold, I say, 'Bring it on!'"

To the right of him, an increasingly annoyed Yuri Plisetsky finally snapped. "Enough with the crap already, Leroy," he said, grabbing the microphone in front of him. "Tell everybody the real reason you're not competing next fall so we can move onto more interesting subjects, like the fact that I'm going to kick both yours and Viktor's asses at the Olympics. That idiot's, too." He pointed his finger in Yuuri Katsuki's direction.

"R-Right," he said, too nervous to even come back with a clever retort to Yuri's challenge.

JJ unzipped his Team Canada jacket and took in a couple of deep breaths, praying that he wouldn't have another panic attack in front of so many people. _It'll be okay_; _you can do this, _he told himself, thinking of Isabella back home in Toronto and taking comfort in knowing he would at least always have her unwavering support, no matter what happened.

"The reason why I've decided to skip next season's Grand Prix is because I've recently learned… Well, I'm going to be a father."

As expected, his second big announcement sent an even bigger shockwave through the crowd, nobody knowing quite how to react. Even Yuri kept his mouth shut for once, the other Yuuri rather awkwardly patting him on the shoulder in…congratulations? Pity? JJ wasn't exactly sure which, but Viktor's fiancé seemed to be a decent enough guy, so he chose to believe it a gesture of goodwill, giving Yuuri a small, grateful smile before he pulled a folded sheet of paper out of his jacket pocket.

Clearing his throat, he unfolded the piece of notebook paper and began to read from the statement he had prepared.

"This wasn't planned, obviously, and I regret that I was unable to live up to the high moral standards I set for myself in regards to my well-known religious beliefs, but Isabella and I want to be the best parents we can for our little prince or princess. We still plan to get married in June, and if all goes according to schedule, the baby will be born sometime in early November, right in the middle of the Grand Prix series. I don't want to risk missing the birth of our child because I'm skating in a competition miles away from home, so I've decided to sit out the first half of the season. No competition is worth that.

"I also want to support Isabella," JJ continued, briefly glancing up from the page to a barrage of camera flashes from the photographers. He sucked in another breath, his trembling fingers almost losing their grip on the paper until he tightened his hold on it. "Along with my parents, Bella has always been my number one supporter. It's no exaggeration to say that if it wasn't for her, I doubt I would be sitting here today as World Champion. She believed in me when I didn't even believe in myself. I want to do the same for her. Being a mother is probably the hardest, toughest job in the world, but I will do my best to be there for her and our child while continuing to train for the Olympics and Worlds. As for afterwards…"

He shook his head, setting the rumpled paper aside. They had decided to put off any further decisions about his skating career until after next season. He wanted to keep skating if possible, but Isabella had her own dreams and goals he didn't want her to sacrifice for his sake. If he won an individual Olympic medal – of any color – JJ figured he would probably retire, maybe even skip Worlds. Along with his new World title, his complete collection of Four Continents medals, and the two bronzes he won at the past two Grand Prix Finals, he would be satisfied with that – a respectable, if short, senior career.

"Well, we'll see how it goes. Right now, I'm just focused on Bella, the baby, and the Olympics. I can't think about anything else right now, so please, ask little Yuri how he's planning to kick my ass in Pyeongchang. I have to go."

With that, JJ pushed his chair back from the table and stood, ignoring the flurry of flashing cameras and shouted questions, as well as Yuri's grumbles not to call him "little Yuri". Skaters were usually required to stay for the entire press conference, but he had nothing else to say. With a shake of his head to his parents, signaling them not to follow him, JJ left the press room and headed to the men's locker room down the hall.

To his relief, the locker room was empty, the other competitors having cleared out soon after the competition ended. JJ collapsed on a bench in front of a row of lockers, his shaking legs giving out on him once he no longer had to put on an act in front of others. His heart was pounding, and he clutched at his sweat-drenched T-shirt, gasping for air.

Another panic attack.

Oh, God!

He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to remember Isabella's instructions from the previous time he had an attack.

_Inhale through your nose… 1, 2, 3, 4… Hold it… 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7… Now, exhale… 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8… Again, inhale… 1, 2, 3, 4…_

JJ imagined her calm voice coaching him through the exercises, his breaths steadily slowing down with each repetition. It took longer than the first time, but after a while, his breathing became regular again, his heartbeat returning to its normal rhythm.

_At least that didn't happen while I was still at the press conference_, he thought, his only comfort. Announcing Isabella's pregnancy to the world had been difficult enough without the public revelation that his panic attacks were continuing post-Barcelona embarrassment.

Pulling out his phone, JJ frowned when he saw the number of notifications awaiting him on various social networks. He didn't even want to see what the fans and haters were writing about him online after his announcement. He had developed a thick skin over the years when it came to people criticizing his skating or his placements – and even he agreed with most skating fans that his old friend and former training mate Otabek probably deserved the bronze over him at that ill-fated Grand Prix Final – but this was different. More personal.

Fraud.

Hypocrite.

Sinner.

He didn't need to read the comments to already know what they said. He'd already called himself the same and worse over the past week.

A part of him must have been a real masochist, though, for his finger tapped the Twitter icon, opening the app to his feed. His announcement had already inspired a trending hashtag: _#JJsBebe_.

_I knew that "holier than thou, saving himself for marriage" crap was just an act. Ugh, JJ Leroy is such a hypocritical asshole. Can't stand him. #JJsBebe #YuriDeservedGold_

_ So disappointing to hear about #JJsBebe. I used to really admire him, but not anymore. At least they didn't abort it?_

_ Shame on you, Jean-Jacques Leroy! #JJsBebe_

_ So, no Trojan sponsorship for JJ? If you're gonna sin, at least wear a condom, stupid. #JJsBebe_

_ Is JJ sure #JJsBebe is even his? Maybe it's an immaculate conception! Haha. #NotACatholic _

_ Jean-Jacques Leroy knocked up his girlfriend? #JJsBebe Whoa, at least there's one male skater who isn't a f—_

By that point, he had read enough. The rest were just more of the same, a seemingly endless scroll of insults, scoldings, and unfunny jokes. While there were some positive tweets – messages of support and congratulations, both for his win and the baby – his eyes scanned pass the majority of them, his fans' voices drowned out by his very vocal detractors.

Sighing, JJ closed out of the app, then pressed down on the icons to his Twitter and Instagram apps and deleted them. Probably best just to stay away from social media for a while, even if it meant missing all the praise and congratulations for his win. His fans – if he even had any left after the scandal blew over – would understand.

He started to put his phone back in his pocket when it began vibrating in his hand. Not really in the mood to talk to anybody at the moment, he was going to let it go to voicemail until he saw Isabella's name on the display.

"Are you okay?" she asked the moment he answered. "You left the press conference early. Did you have another panic attack?"

"No." JJ didn't want to worry her, not when she was at home four thousand miles away and unable to help, anyway. "No, I'm all right. I thought I might, but I managed to get through it, somehow," he lied, clenching his free hand into a fist.

She sighed in relief. "Good. I was so worried… Oh, congratulations! You skated amazing. World champion – that's incredible!"

"Y-Yeah, it is… A dream come true."

"Are you sure you're okay?" Isabella asked after a brief pause. "Maybe we should have waited a few more weeks before making a public announcement about the baby… I shouldn't have asked you to do it right after such a big moment for you."

"I'm fine, Bella. Really," JJ insisted, hoping he sounded more convincing than he felt. "Besides, we both agreed it was better to do it sooner, rather than later. If somebody found out on their own and started spreading rumors…"

"You're right. I just wish I could have been there with you. I know it wasn't easy for you, admitting what happened in front of so many people, but I'm really proud of you, babe. You were so brave."

Funny, he didn't feel very brave. Even now, his mind was racing, trying to think of excuses not to attend the banquet after tomorrow's exhibition. JJ wasn't stupid; he pretended to ignore it, but he knew he wasn't exactly Mr. Popular with most of the other skaters. They were probably all having a big laugh at his expense right about now. _Look at JJ, kicked off his high horse._

"JJ, are you still there?" Isabella asked when he didn't say anything.

"What? Oh, yeah, I'm here," he said, running a hand through his hair. "Sorry, I drifted off for a moment. I think I'm going to go back to the hotel. If I'm lucky, I can sneak out while the reporters are still covering the press conference."

"Oh, okay. I'll talk to you later then. I love you."

"I love you, too."

DISCLAIMER: _Yuri! On Ice_ doesn't belong to me.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I know in the show Viktor was supposed to come back for the second half of the skating season, which made sense story-wise if they were aiming for a possible second season covering Euros/4CCs/Worlds (*fingers crossed that will still one day happen*), but realistically, asking him to be ready to compete at Russian Nationals only a couple of weeks after the Grand Prix Final is a bit…much. Besides, it would make more sense for Viktor to make his comeback during the Olympic season, so that's why I decided not to have him compete in Helsinki.

In case you're curious, this is how I imagined the Top 12 looking:

Gold – Jean-Jacques Leroy

Silver – Yuri Plisetsky

Bronze – Yuuri Katsuki

4th – Otabek Altin

5th – Christophe Giacometti

6th – Michele Crispino

7th – Leo de la Iglesia

8th – Phichit Chulamont

9th – Georgi Popovich

10th – Guang-Hong Ji

11th – Emil Nekola

12th – Seung-Gil Lee

I'm hoping to have the next chapter posted next weekend, but it has been tough to write, so I don't want to make any promises. If it's not done by next weekend, I think it should be up by the next at the latest.

Feel free to follow me on Tumblr at .


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

"Dammit, dammit, dammit!"

JJ yanked off his tie and threw it on the floor of his hotel room. He'd been trying to knot it for the past ten minutes, but no matter what he did, the stupid tie refused to cooperate. He took it as a sign from the universe that he shouldn't go to the closing banquet – not that he wanted to, anyway.

"JJ, are you dressed?" his father asked, knocking on his door. "Your mother and I are about to head downstairs to the banquet."

"I'm not going," he said, unbuttoning the cuffs of his dress shirt. "Tell everyone I have food poisoning or something. I don't care."

"You know you can't stay in there forever, son."

Maybe not, but he could at least stay in hiding until it was time to head to the airport in the morning. In fact, since JJ arrived back at the hotel after yesterday's press conference, he hadn't left his room at all except to participate in the exhibition gala. (And even then, he'd waited until the last possible second to show up, barricading himself in a bathroom stall at the arena so he wouldn't have to interact with any of the other skaters.) He'd even skipped out on practice, making a fool of himself when it came to the closing and he didn't know any of the choreography, but that was kind of par for the course when it came to the hastily put-together group numbers anyway.

"I'll be fine, _Papa_. You and _Maman_ should go down to the banquet and have fun. I'll just order room service."

"JJ, people are not judging you as much as you think they are," his mother said, joining his father outside the door. "I won't lie and say there haven't been any negative comments, but most people are excited about your win and are supportive of you and Bella. The other skaters have even been congratulating us on becoming grandparents. They seem really happy for you, especially Otabek. He was always such a nice boy."

JJ scoffed. Most were probably just being polite, although he supposed at least Otabek's congratulations was sincere. He remembered the year they trained together; Otabek was a good guy, despite his bad boy image. He was actually one of the few skaters JJ considered a friend, although it had been a while since they had hung out together.

"Come down to the banquet, at least for a little while. If it gets to be too overwhelming for you, you can always go back to your room."

"I have a headache," he lied, sitting down on his bed. "Just go on without me, _Maman_. Please."

There was a brief pause as he suspected his parents discussed what to do in soft whispers. "Fine, if that's what you want, we'll go," his mother finally said. "We'll be downstairs in the dining hall if you need us."

With a sigh, JJ fell back on the mattress and curled up on his side, reaching for his phone sitting on the nightstand. Still not even a text message from Isabella. He'd been trying to get in touch with her for the past few hours with no luck, and he was beginning to worry. Even accounting for the time difference, she should be awake by now. Helsinki was six hours ahead, so it was already around noon back home in Toronto.

Had something happened with the baby? Miscarriages were common in the first couple of months of pregnancy… His heart seizing at the thought, JJ tried calling Isabella once again, but she still didn't answer, the call going straight to voicemail.

"It's okay," he told himself after taking in a few deep breaths to calm himself down, setting his phone to the side and rolling onto his back. If something serious really had happened, Mrs. Yang surely would have contacted him. Isabella probably turned off her phone before Mass that morning and had forgotten to turn it back on, that's all. She'd done it plenty of times before. Nothing to worry about.

He wished he could talk to her, though – or better yet, see her. His parents had tried to empathize with him by telling him what they went through when his mother found out she was pregnant with him at the beginning of the 96-97 skating season, leading to their early retirement and ending their dream of winning a second ice dance gold medal at the Nagano Olympics, but honestly, it just made JJ feel even worse. Though they were nothing but understanding and supportive to his face, he knew that underneath it all, they had to be incredibly disappointed in him for not learning from their mistakes.

Besides, back then, the Internet had been in its infancy, ruled by nerds and geeks who probably didn't even know ice dance was a sport. Whatever scandal surrounded his parents' announcement was low scale in comparison to what he was going through, with the entire world able to voice their opinions with just a few taps.

He shook his head, forcing himself not to think of the tweets he had read the day before.

Hugging a pillow to his chest, JJ attempted to go to sleep, having nothing better to do, but another knock on the door ten minutes later caused him to groan and sit back up.

"_Maman_, I already told you I have a headache," he said, dragging himself over to the door. "Will you please just – Bella?"

He blinked, not trusting his eyesight when he opened the door and saw his fiancée standing in the hallway, dressed in her favorite little black dress and pearls, a small suitcase at her feet. Was he dreaming? Before he could even comprehend what was happening, she pushed past him without invitation and ran to the bathroom.

Dumbfounded by her sudden appearance in Helsinki, JJ grabbed her suitcase from where she left it in the hall and set it down beside the bed before knocking on the door to the bathroom. "Bella, are you okay in there?"

"Yeah," she said once the retching stopped. "I think it's over for now. Can you get my toiletry bag from the suitcase for me?"

"Sure." JJ unzipped the suitcase and found a small bag laying on top of her folded clothes. "Here, is this it?" he asked when she opened the door.

"Yes, that's the one. Thanks." Isabella kept the door open as she pulled out her toothbrush and toothpaste and began brushing her teeth. "Oh, no, I didn't miss the banquet, did I?" she asked in a muffled voice, glancing over at him in his rumpled dress clothes. "I booked the earliest flight available, but the plane was delayed a couple of hours due to bad weather."

"No, it just started about twenty minutes ago," he said, leaning against the doorframe. "Did you seriously hop on a plane and fly all this way just to attend some silly figure skating banquet? What about your classes?"

"It's the weekend, and I have some friends taking notes for the lectures I'll miss before we fly back." She rinsed out her mouth before walking over to him and wrapping her arms around his neck. "Besides, I was worried about you, babe. You didn't sound like yourself the last time we talked."

"I'm fine."

"Then why aren't you at the banquet, celebrating your win? You don't really have a headache, do you?

"No," he admitted, pulling out of her embrace and returning to the bedroom, where he sat down at the foot of the bed. "That was just an excuse to get _Maman_ off my back."

Isabella followed after him, taking a seat beside him. "Why?" she asked again, reaching for his hand and threading her fingers with his.

"I just didn't feel like going."

"JJ…"

"It's not a big deal. It's just a stupid party."

She frowned. "Maybe so, but it's a stupid party I flew halfway around the world to attend, so finish getting dressed and let's go. Where's your tie?"

Isabella started to stand, but on impulse, JJ pulled her back, lowering her down to the mattress and straddling her hips. Her eyes widened as she stared up at him, her small chest heaving up and down. "What are you doing?"

He wasn't even sure himself. His only thought had been to keep her from finding his tie and forcing him to go to the party, but…

"Let's have sex," JJ decided, pinning her down by her wrists and kissing the side of her neck. That sounded a lot more fun than attending some dumb banquet where everybody was probably gossiping about him behind his back.

"We can't," she said, even as a small gasp escaped her lips when his lips found a particularly sensitive spot. "We're still not ma—"

"It doesn't matter anymore." What was even the point of trying to keep to their vow after everything that had happened? "You're already pregnant, and I'm already a sinner, so who the hell cares what we do?"

She froze, turning her head to the side.

"Jean, get off of me. I'm not sleeping with you, not like this."

Isabella's voice was soft, but firm, inviting no argument. JJ immediately let go of his grip on her arms and climbed off of her, shaking as he realized what he had almost done.

That wasn't him.

The mattress shifted underneath him as Isabella stood up once again. A few seconds later, she returned. "Get up," she ordered him.

JJ did as he was told, allowing her to upturn his collar and place his discarded tie around his neck. "I'm sorry," he said as she tied the silk fabric into a perfect knot on the first try.

"I know you are." She sighed, folding down the collar and smoothing out the wrinkles as best she could. "Babe, talk to me," she said. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing… Everything." He rested his forehead against her shoulder, unshed tears burning his eyes. "I-I don't know," he said, his voice cracking. "I just feel like I've let everybody down. Your parents, my parents, my sponsors, my fans…"

"Oh, JJ…" She brought a hand to the nape of his neck, kissing him near his ear. "You haven't let me down."

"But I did. That night… I should have protected you."

"I'm just as much to blame as you are. I could have said 'no', but I wanted to be with you so much…"

JJ shook his head, pulling away and sitting back down on the bed. He never should have brought the idea up in the first place. He had allowed himself to give into temptation, disappointing God most of all.

Hiding his face in his hands, a sob shuddered through his body, all his pent-up emotions from the past week finally bursting through. He had done his best to put on a strong façade, to concentrate on winning Worlds and to be the confident, inspirational King JJ everyone always expected him to be, but he couldn't do it anymore.

When he looked in the mirror, he no longer saw a king. All he saw staring back at him was a pitiful man, a fraud only pretending to be a king.

Isabella sat back down beside him, pulling him into a comforting embrace and allowing him to cry on her shoulder, his tears soaking the fabric of her pretty dress.

"I wish you would stop doing this to yourself, JJ," she said in a soft voice when his cries finally quieted down and his head fell in her lap. Her fingers combed through his hair. "Nobody expects you to be perfect except you."

"But –"

"It's true," she insisted, not even giving him a chance to protest. "I love that you want to be the best at everything you do, but you can't keep putting so much pressure on yourself, babe. It's not healthy, and it's not realistic."

"I know," he said practically in a whisper, his voice hoarse after crying so much. She told him much the same thing during the Grand Prix Final when he had his breakdown.

"Then why?"

Slowly, JJ sat back up and swiped his sleeve over his eyes. "It's who I am, Bella," he said. "You know that. I'm King JJ – champion skater, talented musician, brilliant student, dedicated philanthropist, devoted Christian. Or at least that's who I was." He sighed, staring down at his hands. "I'm not sure I even know who I am anymore," he admitted. "I've just felt so…lost."

For a long moment, Isabella didn't say anything. Then she slid backwards on the bed, moving to position herself behind JJ. She enveloped her arms around his shoulders, pressing herself against his back and resting her chin on his shoulder. "Do you want to know who I think you are?" she asked, not waiting for an answer before continuing. "You're Jean-Jacques Leroy."

"Bella…"

"He's not a king, not a saint." Her embrace tightened around him. "He's only a man. A very talented, very handsome man," – JJ allowed himself a small smile at that – "but a man, all the same. He's Nathalie and Alain's beloved son, Madeleine and Philippe's idolized big brother. He's my fiancé and the father of my child. He's loud and enthusiastic, sometimes a little obnoxious –"

JJ whipped his head around at that. "Hey!" Wasn't she supposed to be making him feel better?

"Babe, I love you more than anything, but you know it's true."

"Yeah, okay," he mumbled, turning back around and allowing Isabella to continue with the rest of her monologue uninterrupted.

"Anyway, he can sometimes be a little obnoxious, but he has one of the biggest hearts I know." One of her hands slid downward, his heart beating underneath the flat palm she placed over his chest. "He loves God and his country, his family and his friends. He loves his fans, and they love him back with a passion that almost makes me jealous at times. He wants to make the people he loves happy, wants them to be proud of him, but sometimes he makes mistakes. That's okay, though, because you know what? Everybody does. That's what makes us human. That's the way God made us."

Closing his eyes, JJ leaned back into her embrace and sighed. They were pretty words, and on a logical level, he understood what she was trying to say, but still…

"I'm not helping, am I?" Isabella asked, loosening her hold on him. "I'm sorry. I wish I knew the right words –"

"No." He twisted around, turning his body so that he was facing her, one foot planted on the floor. "No, you've been absolutely wonderful, Bella," JJ said, caressing her cheek. He forced a smile to his face. "I still can't believe you flew all this way just because you were worried about me. I really appreciate it, especially when –"

"What?"

Dropping his hand to his lap, JJ looked downwards at the quilted bedspread. He supposed there was no point in keeping it a secret any longer. "I-I lied to you," he said softly. "When you called after I ran out of the press conference… I did have another panic attack."

"You did?" Her voice was surprisingly free of the anger he expected for keeping something so important from her.

"I didn't want to worry you." He let out a hollow chuckle. "But I guess that didn't work, did it? I worried you anyway."

"Oh, JJ…"

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I think I was mostly just ashamed, to be honest. I don't understand why they keep happening. What happened in Barcelona… I thought it was a one-time thing. I really did, but it's not, and it scares me, because…"

"Because?" she prodded when he trailed off.

After a moment of hesitation, JJ touched Isabella, fingers brushing against her flat stomach. It was still so strange to think that a brand new life – a life they created – was growing inside her.

"JJ?"

"Do you think I can handle it? Being a father?" he asked. "I mean, being a parent has to be one of the most stressful jobs there is, but if I keep having these attacks…"

"I…"

JJ glanced up, his heart sinking at the conflicted look on his fiancée's face. Isabella was his number one cheerleader, the one person he could count on to always have faith in him. If even she doubted him… "It's okay," he said, pulling his hand away. "I know –"

"N-No, that's not it." Isabella reached for his hand, bringing it to her mouth for a kiss. "It's not that I think you _can't_ handle it. It's just…I think you need help, JJ," she said. "Help that I doubt I can give, as much as I wish to God I could. I know you were resistant before, but you should give therapy another try. I really think Dr. Gilles can help you deal with your anxiety problems if you would just give him a chance."

That wasn't the answer JJ wanted to hear. He wanted her to tell him of course he could handle it, that he was going to be an amazing father, and all he needed was to find the self-confidence he used to have in spades before everything went to hell in Barcelona…but maybe it was what he _needed_ to hear. He couldn't keep pretending that he was fine when he obviously wasn't, not when he would soon have a wife and child to support. He had to get better, for their sakes as well as his.

"Okay," JJ said, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'll make an appointment with Dr. Gilles as soon as we get back home and give it another shot."

"Good." Isabella hugged him tightly. "And you _are_ going to be a wonderful father," she assured him. "There's no one else I would rather be doing this with than you. You know that, right?"

JJ nodded. Even if she was just saying it to be supportive, he was determined not to let her or the baby down. He would do whatever it took.

"Do you still want to go to the banquet?" he asked when they finally broke apart, glancing over at the clock. "Dinner is probably already over, but…"

"No, that's okay. I don't have anything else to wear." She indicated her tear-soaked and snot-stained dress. "This is the only dress I brought with me."

"I can buy you another dress if you want. I think there's a boutique downstairs."

"Thanks, but that's not necessary. I don't want you to force yourself to go…unless you really want to?"

"Honestly?" He shook his head. "I just don't feel up to it right now. I'm sorry. I know you flew all this way…"

Isabella squeezed his fingers. "It's okay. I'd probably end up barfing on the dance floor anyway, and I'd rather not end up on Leo's and Phichit's Instagrams like that."

"Leo wouldn't post anything like that…probably." He'd always liked Leo de la Iglesia, another one of his former rinkmates. The American skater loved social media, but he usually had some discretion when it came to what was appropriate to post. Phichit Chulanont, on the other hand… "But you're right. Better not to risk it," he said. "Are you hungry? We can order room service."

"I'm not sure if I would be able to hold anything down, to be honest. I'd really rather just go to bed if we're not going to the banquet. It was a long flight."

She did look tired, faint dark circles under her eyes. "Sure. Where are you staying?"

"I managed to get a last-minute reservation at this hotel. I think my room is on the next floor up?" She walked over to her suitcase and unzipped the front pocket, pulling out her keycard to check the room number. "Yeah, Room 606."

That was right above his room, Room 506. "Do you need any help?"

"No, all I have is this. I'll be fine."

Isabella grabbed the handle of her suitcase, and JJ walked her to the door, giving her a kiss before opening it for her. As she was leaving, however, he reached for her elbow, stopping her.

"Um…you don't have to go," he said when she turned around, giving him a questioning look. "You can spend the night…here…with me…"

"JJ…"

"I-I don't mean like that," he clarified, rubbing the back of his neck. "We wouldn't do anything. Unless, maybe, if you wanted to…" He shook his head, realizing that was a bad idea the moment the words left his mouth. "Never mind. I'll see you in the morning."

"Wait." Isabella grabbed the edge of the door, preventing him from shutting it. "So we would just sleep together? _Only_ sleep?"

"Yeah, but –"

"I wouldn't mind," she said, the faintest hint of a blush coloring her pale cheeks. "As long as we don't do anything."

He nodded. "I promise. I just want to hold you."

Stepping back into his hotel room, she closed the door behind her and embraced him once again.

DISCLAIMER: _Yuri! On Ice_ doesn't belong to me.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Sorry for the delay. I actually did finish this chapter on time, but then we had internet problems that prevented me from posting last weekend. Next chapter should be up next Saturday. If you've been wondering when all the other characters I tagged will show up, you'll get a chance to see what happened at the banquet JJ and Isabella skipped out on, so I hope you look forward to it!


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

JJ awoke first the next morning, smiling when he opened his eyes and saw Isabella asleep beside him, her head resting on his shoulder and one of her arms slung over his waist. They were still dressed in their nightclothes – he in faded pajama pants and a T-shirt from his "JJ Style" clothing line, she in his dress shirt, which she had insisted on wearing to bed even though he assumed she had packed a nightgown of her own.

His arm had fallen asleep sometime during the night, but JJ was reluctant to move, not wanting to risk waking Isabella when she was sleeping so peacefully. Instead, he just stared at her in quiet awe until the alarm on his phone went off, "The Theme of King JJ" blasting at full volume.

JJ groaned as Isabella startled awake at the noise. "Sorry about that," he said, pulling his arm out from underneath her and rolling over to reach for his phone on the nightstand. "I forgot I had set an alarm."

Dismissing the alarm, he made a mental note to find a new song to set as his ringtone. If he ever heard that song again, it would be too soon.

"What time is it?" she mumbled, rubbing at her eyes.

"Eight." JJ set his phone back on the table and laid back down, not wanting to get up just yet. His parents usually let him sleep in the day after a competition concluded, so they probably wouldn't bother him until nine at the earliest. "Hey, beautiful," he said, caressing her cheek. "_Hyvää huomenta_." Whenever he competed in a foreign country, JJ always liked to learn some basic phrases in the local language to show appreciation to his fans.

"Good morning," she said, a smile on her lips. "This is nice, isn't it? Waking up in the same bed… We've never done it before."

"Yeah." He reached for her nearby hand, threading his fingers with hers. "I could get used to this…"

"I should hope so. It won't be long before we'll be able to wake up like this every morning."

"You're going to have to get in the habit of waking early, then. I usually get up at five to get ready to go to the rink."

"Five?" Isabella wrinkled her nose. "I know you have early practices, but every day?"

"Except Sundays, of course." Sundays were his off day, a chance to allow his body to recover from the wear and tear he put it through the rest of the week.

"Mmm, then, we'll do this every Sunday," she decided, snuggling closer against him, clutching the front of his T-shirt. "We'll wake up together and make love, then I'll cook you pancakes for breakfast before Mass."

"Pancakes, huh?" JJ grinned, lightly stroking her arm. "Do you even know how to make pancakes? You're not exactly Anna Olson in the kitchen, you know…"

Isabella scoffed, kicking him under the blanket. "You jerk!" she said, laughing when JJ rolled her over on her back in retaliation, pinning her underneath him. "I'm not that bad."

"My nineteenth birthday," he reminded her. "You made me that awful lemon chiffon cake…"

"Okay, that was pretty terrible. Chiffon cakes are hard! You still ate it, though."

"Of course I did. You went through all the trouble of making it for me, after all. It was sweet, even if the cake was too sour."

"Well, I'll make you a better one for your next birthday," she promised.

"I'll look forward to it," he said, lowering himself for a kiss until Isabella turned her face to the side and covered his mouth with her hand, pushing him away.

"Ugh, morning breath. Go brush your teeth first, babe."

Probably a good idea. He felt the stirrings of an arousal, and if they started kissing, JJ didn't trust himself to want to stop. Climbing off of her, he stood up and yawned as he stretched his arms high over his head. "Okay, I'm gonna take a shower. You can order us breakfast if you want."

"Sure. What do you want?"

"Hmm...pancakes. It's not Sunday anymore, but you got me in the mood for them," he said, grabbing some clean clothes on his way to the bathroom.

When JJ came back out fifteen minutes later, drying his hair with a towel, Isabella was sitting up against the headboard, scrolling through her social media accounts on her phone. "Anything interesting?" he asked, doing his best to ignore how amazing her bare legs looked underneath his shirt. He didn't want to have to take _another_ cold shower.

"I'm checking out photos from the banquet," she said. "Seems like everybody had a great time."

"Mmm. Did Chris break out the stripper pole again?"

"No, unfortunately."

JJ cocked an eyebrow. "Unfortunately?"

He never realized she had enjoyed Chris and Yuuri's pole dancing so much.

Comprehending what she had implied, a light blush crossed the bridge of Isabella's nose as she tapped the edge of the phone against her mouth. "I mean, um…oops?"

JJ laughed, tossing his towel on the floor and crawling back on the bed. He didn't mind, knowing that it was just innocent fun. Though it didn't do anything for him personally, even he had to admit that Chris and Yuuri were very impressive that night.

Smiling, Isabella reached over and brushed his damp hair back off his face.

"What?" he asked, propping himself up on his elbow.

"Nothing," she said. "It's just nice to hear you laugh again. Really laugh, I mean. It's been a while."

JJ hadn't noticed, but when he thought back on the past week, he realized it was true. "Yeah, I guess it has."

"Are you okay?"

"I'm…better," he said after a long pause. It had been a relief to finally talk to Isabella about the things he had been holding inside ever since he found out about the baby – no, maybe even since Barcelona. He still had some doubts that therapy could help him deal with his issues, but he was certainly willing to give it another shot if there was even a chance it could work. "I still have a lot of stuff to work, though…"

"You can do it, babe," she said, kissing the top of his head. "I know you can. And I'll support you in any way I can. Just let me know what you need, okay?"

He squeezed her hand. "Thanks."

"Oh, I almost forgot!" She turned her attention back to her phone. "Here, you need to watch this video," Isabella said, holding up the phone so he could see. It was opened to Leo de la Iglesia's Instagram account.

JJ shook his head, pushing it away. "I'm not interested. I'm taking a break from social media for a while."

"Trust me, you'll like this. Just watch the video and ignore the comments."

She again passed him her phone. With some reluctance, JJ accepted it and sat back up, tapping on the latest video to play.

On screen were Leo and a baby-faced Chinese teenager whose name JJ couldn't recall off the top of his head, although he recognized him as one of the debuting seniors.

"Hey, peeps! It's Leo –"

"—and Guang-Hong! –"

"—coming to you live from the banquet closing out the 2017 World Championships in beautiful Helsinki, Finland. As you know, we didn't do too well –"

"Hey, seventh place isn't bad, Leo," Guang-Hong interrupted. "Especially when you don't have a quad yet."

"I'm working on it, I'm working on it…" Leo mumbled, his lack of a consistent quad a bit of a sore spot of his. "Congrats on your tenth place finish, too, by the way. Top ten at your first senior Worlds is fantastic!"

Guang-Hong pouted rather adorably. "Yeah, I guess, but I'll do better next year."

"Anyway, how about checking in with some of the actual medalists?" Leo circled around with the camera until it landed upon Yuuri and Viktor in the middle of the dance floor, performing what appeared to be a very sexy Argentine tango. "Look, there's men's bronze medalist Yuuri Katsuki and his fiancé/coach/skating legend Viktor Nikiforov cutting up a rug… Um, is it just me, or is it getting kind of hot in here?"

"D-Definitely not just you. I'm not even sure I'm old enough to watch them."

Leo turned the camera back on himself just as it appeared the two were about to kiss, no doubt disappointing a number of his viewers. "No clothes have come off as of yet –"

"Unfortunately," a familiar voice said off-camera, a blond man passing behind Leo in the background.

"Oh, hey, Chris. Want to say a quick hello?"

Christophe Giacometti stopped and turned back around. "Just a quickie? Sure," he agreed, blowing a flirtatious kiss to the camera. "_Bonsoir, mesdames et messieurs_. The season's over and I'm about to go blow off some steam – if you catch my drift – but wait until you see what I have planned for next season. My new programs are going to melt the ice."

"Y-You've already decided on your Olympic programs?" Guang-Hong asked. "What music are you using?"

Winking, Chris brought a finger to his lips. "That's a secret for now. You'll just have to wait and see. Now, if you will excuse me…"

With that, he left to join his choreographer/rumored lover who had been standing off to the side, the camera lingering on their retreating figures for a few seconds before Leo's and Guang-Hong's faces again reappeared on the screen, both of them blushing.

"Ah, so where was I?" Leo asked. "Oh, right, nobody has taken their clothes off as of yet, but we'll keep you posted throughout the evening. After all, the night is still young and there's an open bar!"

JJ frowned, pausing the video. "Is there a point to this, Bella?" he asked, not seeing why she had wanted him to watch it. So far, it seemed like one of Leo's typical banquet vlogs, nothing out of the ordinary. "I don't really care if Yuuri and Viktor take their clothes off."

"Just keep watching," Isabella said. "I promise, it'll be worth it."

"If you say so…"

He tapped the video again, resuming it where he left off.

"Guang-Hong, do you see the other Yuri around?"

"Um, I just saw him a few minutes ago… Oh, there he is!" Guang-Hong said, pointing somewhere off to the right.

"Ah, lucky!" Still talking to the camera, Leo began walking backwards in the direction his friend had indicated. "Not only have we found the new men's silver medalist, Yuri Plisetsky, we also have last year's surprise bronze medalist, Otabek Altin, who just narrowly missed out on making the podium again, and the lovely Mila Babicheva, who won her very first World title in the ladies' event. Let's see if they're willing to say a few words to you fans out there," he said, approaching the trio. "Hey, guys, how are you enjoying the banquet so far?"

"It suc—" Yuri began until Mila slapped a hand over his mouth, muffling the rest of his reply.

"I think what Yura was trying to say is that it's such a relief to finally be done with the season and be able to kick back and relax with everybody here," she said as Yuri glared and pulled her hand away.

"What the hell? That was NOT what I was going to say, and you know it, Mila."

Mila smirked. "Well, that's what you're supposed to say. Hasn't any of the media training the federation's been giving you sunken in yet? You know the officials weren't too happy with your behavior at the press conference yesterday."

"Like I give a sh—" Mila's hand once again muffled the curse.

"Sorry about that," she said with a roll of her eyes. "He's at a difficult age, you know."

"Fortunately, we're not the media," Leo said, "so feel free to be one hundred percent honest – although maybe tone down the language some. This is a family show…theoretically. Anyway, Yuri, how do you really feel about the night so far?"

"It sucks," Yuri said , crossing his arms. "All this stupid DJ is playing is old people music. They should have hired Beka instead."

Otabek sighed. "I keep telling you, if you have any requests, go up to the DJ and make them. I'm sure he'd be happy to play whatever song you want."

"You're missing the point, Beka. I want to see _you_ deejaying, not some old fart who's stuck in the eighties."

"You know, there was _some_ good music in the eighties," music lover Leo pointed out. "Prince, Madonna, Bruce Springsteen, Queen, Cyndi Lauper, Run-DMC, Gloria Estefan –"

"Yeah, but he's not playing any of the good stuff. It's all Air Supply and Katrina and the Waves."

"Hey, I _like_ 'Walking on Sunshine'," Mila said. "It's a fun, happy song!"

"You would," Yuri muttered, Mila punching him in the arm. "Ow! How many times do I have to tell you to learn your own strength?"

"Oops, sorry!"

Guang-Hong laughed, taking out his own phone. "I never realized you two were so close. You're like brother and sister!"

Throwing her arm around a scowling Yuri's shoulder, Mila grinned and held up a peace sign with her free hand as Guang-Hong took a snapshot of the two of them. "Yep, and Big Sister Mila is here to keep little brother out of trouble."

"Quit it. I don't need a fuc—fine, _freakin'_ babysitter," Yuri said, shrugging her arm away. "Beka, come on. Let's go talk to the DJ. Maybe you can give him some pointers."

With an apologetic shrug to the others, Otabek followed after Yuri, Mila pouting for a moment before spotting the Crispino twins chatting with Emil Nekola at a nearby table. She excused herself and went to join them as well.

After that, Leo and Guang-Hong caught up with some of the medalists from the other disciplines, JJ's interest starting to wander. He was about to skip forward a couple of minutes when he heard Leo mention his name.

"As for our new men's World Champion, JJ Leroy –

JJ unconsciously held his breath. Finally, this must have been the part Isabella had wanted him to see.

"—I'm told he wasn't able to come tonight due to a bad case of food poisoning," Leo said with a shake of his head. "That's rough, man. I had food poisoning at Four Continents, and let me tell you, it was not pretty. Not pretty at all."

"Don't remind me," Guang-Hong said. "I still don't know how you managed to skate like that."

"I don't know either. I honestly thought I was going to die. Must have been pure willpower," he said with a shrug. "Enough about me, though. If you're watching this, JJ, we hope you feel better soon. Also…" Leo dropped his phone to what appeared to be his chest, shouting off camera. "Hey, guys, we're doing it! Get over here if you want to join in. You, too, Plisetsky! I see you hiding behind that column. Otabek, drag him over if you have to."

"How about I carry him over?" a voice that sounded like Mila's suggested.

"Uh, I don't think that's really necess—_Dios mio_, she actually did it!" He quickly focused the camera on Mila, who was lifting a flailing and cursing Yuri over her head to a round of hearty applause from the people around her. "Are you guys seeing this? Looks like this is the debut of a new Russian pair, Babicheva/Plisetsky! I give it plus two G.O.E."

"Let me down, you hag!" Yuri yelled. "I never agreed to this. When I get down from here, I'm gonna – Wait, only plus two? Damn it, Leo, you suck as a judge. This is clearly plus three material."

JJ chuckled and again paused the video, glancing over at Isabella, who was hunched over and giggling behind her hand. "Is this what you wanted me to see?"

"No, but –" Isabella sat back up, taking a few seconds to regain her bearings and wipe the tears from her eyes. "No, that's not the main reason I wanted you to watch the video," she started over, "but it was pretty hilarious, right?"

"It was," he agreed, rewinding the video back about thirty seconds so they could watch it again, the two of them bursting into another round of uncontrollable laughter.

"No, keep going, keep going," she said when he started to rewind it a second time. "The best part is coming up next."

"Okay…" He couldn't imagine anything topping Mila's and Yuri's pair lift, though. That almost made him regret not attending the banquet so that he could have witnessed it in person.

Almost…but not quite.

It took Yuri some time to cool off once Mila set him back down beside one of the banquet tables. Sitting around the table were JJ's Canadian teammates, joined by a bunch of other skaters – mostly his fellow competitors, although he noticed a few girls from the ladies' event and a handful of ice dancers who JJ's parents had coached at one time or another, including the reigning World Champions from France. JJ's brow furrowed, wondering what was going on.

"Is that everybody?" Leo asked, pointing his phone at the group. "Okay, on the count of _tres_. _Uno…dos…tres_!"

"CONGRATULATIONS, JJ AND ISABELLA!" the entire group shouted in unison – well, except for Yuri, who just crossed his arms and glared.

Tears welled in JJ's eyes, Isabella resting her head on his shoulder.

"Hey, JJ, I know we kind of lost touch after you left Chicago," Leo said, turning the camera back on himself, "but I just wanted to let you know how happy I am for you and Isabella. You two are going to be amazing parents, I just know it. Oh, and congratulations on winning Worlds, too. Wow, a world title, a wedding, and a baby all in one year- you are a lucky man, Jean-Jacques Leroy. We'll miss you on the Grand Prix circuit next season, but I hope we get to compete against each other again in Pyeongchang. Good luck with everything, and God bless!" When he finished, he looked off to the side. "Otabek, you wanted to say something, too, right?"

"No, he doesn't!" Yuri's voice shrilled off-screen. "Beka has better things to do than –"

"Yura, I'm perfectly capable of answering for myself," Otabek said, interrupting. "Go get us some cake from the dessert table. I'll catch up with you in a couple of minutes."

Yuri huffed. "Fine. Vanilla or chocolate?

"Chocolate."

Otabek's ever stoic face appeared on the screen a few seconds later, Yuri having apparently left to get the cake. "Uh, hey, JJ," he said with a brief wave. "Leo pretty much said everything I wanted to say, so…congrats on everything, I guess. See you at the wedding."

_Heh, typical Otabek_. _He never was much for words,_ JJ thought, smiling through his tears. He appreciated the sentiment all the same, still touched that so many of the skaters had come together to show their support for him and Isabella. He had been wrong to think his rivals would be so willing to kick him when he was down, taking pleasure from his fall from grace.

"See, I told you would like it," Isabella said, rubbing his arm.

"Yeah." JJ sniffled, wiping his tears away with his free hand. "Yeah, I'm glad you showed me."

On Isabella's phone, the video continued playing, Leo and Guang-Hong about to check in with Georgi Popovich and his new girlfriend when Otabek's face reappeared on screen. "Oh, yeah, before I forget, Yura's gonna be my plus one to the wedding," he said, Guang-Hong squealing in the background. "Hope that's okay. If not, let me know. My number's still the same. Bye."

JJ closed out of the video, assuming there was nothing else important for him to see, and glanced over at his fiancée. "That okay with you?" he asked, remembering what happened in Barcelona. "I know the last time you two saw each other, things got a little tense…"

Isabella sighed. "It's fine. I'll be the bigger person if that's what Otabek wants," she said, her eyes unexpectedly lighting up a second later. "Oh, do you think Yuri and Mila would be willing to put on an encore performance?"

JJ doubted Yuri would, but… "You could always ask Mila."

"Good idea." She snatched her phone from JJ's hands and started typing, presumably texting Mila, who she was on friendly terms with. "Mila's on board!" she announced a short time later, showing him Mila's reply – a devil emoticon.

JJ smirked. "You may have just unleashed a demon. You know that, right?"

Isabella shrugged, unconcerned. "Oh, well, he deserves it after the deplorable way he behaved in Barcelona."

"I thought you were going to be the bigger person?"

"Letting him come to the wedding is big enough," she said, setting her phone aside and moving to sit on her knees, facing JJ. "Enough about Yuri Plisetsky, though. I'm still waiting for my morning kiss."

"Oh, right." Placing his hands on Isabella's arms, JJ started to lean forward only for the moment to be broken by the sound of someone knocking on the door. "Ah, that must be breakfast," he said, releasing his hold on Isabella and climbing out of bed. "Good, I'm starving." He hadn't eaten anything since lunch the previous day.

Isabella, however, grabbed his hand, stopping him. "JJ, wait," she whispered. "I didn't order anything."

Following her lead, he started whispering, too. "You didn't?"

"I was going to, but then I saw the notification about Leo's video and got distracted."

Confused, JJ looked over his shoulder at the door. "Then who –?"

Whoever it was knocked again, louder than the first time. "JJ, sweetie, are you awake?"

Recognizing the voice as belonging to his mother, he fought back the urge to swear. He and Isabella hadn't done anything, but admittedly it didn't look good for her to be in his hotel room so early in the morning, dressed in nothing but his shirt.

Isabella jumped out of bed, grabbing her suitcase. "Don't worry," she said. "I'll hide in the bathroom. I need to get dressed, anyway."

"Good idea."

"JJ?" his mother said, still awaiting an answer.

"Uh, I'm coming, _Maman_!" he called out. "Just a minute."

Once Isabella was safely hidden in the bathroom and he was certain that there were no signs of her laying around, betraying her presence, JJ opened the door, letting his mother in with a kiss on the cheek. "Good morning, _Maman_!"

"Oh, good morning!" she said, seeming a little surprised by his cheerful greeting. She smiled. "You look happier today. I suppose it was a good idea for Isabella to come visit, after all."

JJ froze. "Y-You know?"

"Of course. She texted me when she arrived, asking for your room number so she could surprise you."

"Oh, right." That made sense. "Yeah, she definitely surprised me."

"Anyway, are you hungry? _Papa_ and I were about to go down for breakfast."

"Breakfast?" JJ rubbed the back of his neck, his eyes darting over to the door leading to the bathroom. "Uh…"

Noticing his furtive glance, his mother raised an eyebrow, then shouted, "Bella, you're welcome to join us as well!"

His eyes widened. "H-How…?"

"I dropped by Bella's room first since we're on the same floor. When she didn't answer, I had a feeling she might be here."

So much for keeping Isabella's sleepover a secret… "We didn't do anything," JJ said, knowing it was pointless to deny it. "I mean, she spent the night, but not like that. It was completely innocent."

"JJ, you're about to be a husband and father." His mother placed her hand against his cheek, a wistful smile on her lips. "You're not my little baby any more. I think you're old enough now to make your own choices. You don't have to justify yourself to me."

"But we really didn't –"

"Mm-hmm. Whatever you say, sweetie," she said, patting his cheek. She clearly didn't believe him at all. In a louder voice, she called out, "Bella, dear, are you coming? Your morning sickness isn't too bad today, is it?"

The bathroom door creaked open, a blushing Isabella popping her head out. "Um, sure, breakfast sounds great, Nathalie," she said. "I just need to finish getting dressed."

"No rush. You two can come join us whenever you're ready." His mother started heading for the door. "Oh, and JJ, make sure you're packed. We'll be leaving for the airport in a couple of hours. Don't forget your passport and your skates."

"Yes, _Maman_."

With that final reminder, his mother left.

Closing the door behind her, JJ groaned and leaned against it, whacking the back of his head against the solid wood.

"What's wrong?" Isabella asked, coming out of the bathroom. She had changed out of his dress shirt and into a pair of white jeans and a navy turtleneck.

"_Maman_ doesn't believe me. She thinks we fooled around last night."

Isabella walked over, placing her hands on his shoulders. "Is it that big a deal if she does? She didn't seem to mind."

"I know, but…" Sighing, he shook his head and smiled. "No, you're right. I guess it doesn't matter."

"Of course, since she already assumes…"

Her hands began roaming down his chest, JJ's breath hitching at the back of his throat when she reached the waistline of his jeans. "Bella? What are you doing?"

"You know, you stopped me that night before I could give you your _real_ Valentine's gift."

He swallowed…hard. "You mean…"

Nodding, she shyly looked up at him. "Valentine's Day may be over, but I think you deserve a present for winning Worlds." Isabella dropped down to her knees, reaching for the zipper of his fly. "May I?"

JJ looked down at her, nervously licking his lips. Of course he wanted her to do it, but… He clenched his hands into fists at his sides. "Let's wait," he said, knowing he would only feel guilty if he allowed her to continue.

"It that's what you want." She rose back to her feet, bringing her mouth next to his ear. "I'll just give it to you on our wedding night instead," she promised.

Already regretting his decision, JJ let out a moan. "Can we please just elope already?"

Isabella chuckled, landing a quick peck on his cheek. "Two months, zero days, six hours, and..." – she pulled out her phone to check the time – "…twenty-three minutes, babe."

"You've been keeping track?"

"What can I say?" She slipped her phone back in her pocket and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down for a kiss. "I can't wait to be your wife."

The feeling was one hundred percent mutual.

DISCLAIMER: _Yuri! On Ice_ doesn't belong to me.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: One more chapter left! Barring any last minute changes, it should be up next Saturday. Thanks again for reading.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six

Aurelia Gabrielle Leroy came into the world in the morning hours of November 10, 2017 with the lungs of a future rock star.

JJ used to think the happiest moment of his life was winning his first senior Canadian championship at sixteen. That paled in comparison to standing at the top of the podium at Worlds. Getting married to Isabella in June topped both those achievements by a long shot, but nothing quite measured up to the pure joy of holding his tiny daughter in his arms for the very first time – not even winning an individual Olympic bronze medal and helping Canada earn a silver in the team event in Pyeongchang the following February.

He went on to defend his World title a month later. At an event marred by mostly sloppy skates by skaters too tired in the aftermath of all the Olympic pressure, JJ skated perhaps his two best programs ever, earning world records in the short, free, and overall. He skated determined to go out on top, having decided to retire at the end of the season after achieving his goal of making the Olympic podium, but Isabella convinced him to keep skating for at least a couple more years. The 2020 Worlds were scheduled to take place in Montreal, the city of his birth; it seemed fitting to end his competitive career in front of a hometown crowd.

Not that it would be easy. Aurelia – or Aggie, as they had taken to calling her in reference to her initials – demanded a lot of attention, but his parents were a God-send. Whenever Isabella had a lecture, she dropped Aggie off at the rink, and either his mother or his father would look after her while the other coached JJ on the ice. Sometimes his in-laws helped out, too, especially when a competition was drawing close and he really needed the support of both of his coaches.

At home, JJ was a hands-on father, taking care of Aggie as much as possible so that Isabella could concentrate on her studies. He had given up on his own academic career on the advice of Dr. Gilles, who encouraged him to stop spreading himself so thin and concentrate on the things that were most important to him. JJ planned to join the family business and become a coach/choreographer after he retired, so a diploma wasn't something he needed. Maybe in the future he would go back and finish his business degree, but for the moment, he was content to focus on his family, his skating, and his charity work. Even his music hobby took a backseat, although he had composed a song shortly after Aggie's birth in her honor.

"…More precious than medal…You changed my world, my golden girl…"

As JJ crooned the last verse of the lullaby, he glanced over at the door to the nursery and smiled when he noticed Isabella standing in the doorway, phone in hand. "Are you recording me?" he whispered. Six-month old Aggie had fallen asleep on his shoulder, her breathing soft and even.

Isabella slid the phone back into her pocket and walked over to the rocker, kissing JJ on the top of his head. "Sorry, I couldn't resist, babe," she said in an equally quiet voice. "Your fans will love the quality '_Papa _JJ' content."

He normally didn't mind, but… "Could you not upload that video?" They both posted plenty of cute Aggie pictures on Instagram, but the moment felt too private – too intimate – to share with the world.

"Sure. I'll just keep it for my own enjoyment then."

"Thanks." He reached back for her hand on the headrest, brushing his thumb over her knuckles. "Hey, did you finish your paper?"

"Almost. I need to check out some resources at the library, but I should be able to finish it by Monday, thanks to you. I'm sorry you've been on Aggie duty almost non-stop this week."

"I don't mind." JJ looked down at the sleeping angel in his arms, nuzzling her dark hair. "It's the end of the term. I know you're busy, and the skating season is over for me."

"Still, I promise I'll make it up to you over summer break," she said. "Here, let me see her."

A part of JJ didn't want to let her go, perfectly happy to keep rocking Aggie for the rest of his life, but it was getting late and he had an early morning tomorrow, starting with the second of his twice-monthly therapy sessions with Dr. Gilles before participating in a charity golf tournament to raise money for a local children's hospital. He stifled a yawn as he passed the baby over to Isabella, who snuggled her for a long moment before laying her down in her crib.

"She's gotten so big," Isabella said, staring down at Aggie in awe. "It won't be long before she's walking and talking..."

JJ came up behind Isabella and wrapped his arms around her waist. She had yet to lose all of the weight she gained during her pregnancy, but he didn't mind at all, loving the soft curves it gave her. "She can take her time with that," he said. "Don't want her to grow up…"

"JJ, you can't keep her a baby forever."

"Wanna bet?"

She rolled her eyes. "Come on, babe, let's go to bed. You're delirious."

Bed sounded heavenly.

Isabella reached for his hand and led him to their bedroom across the hall, JJ crawling underneath the covers while she changed into her nightshirt. He could barely keep his eyes open, only vaguely aware when Isabella joined him in bed, snuggling up against him.

"JJ?"

"Hmm?" He kept his eyes closed, already starting to doze off.

"I really do appreciate everything you've done for us," she said in a soft voice, running her fingers through the top layer of his hair. "I know this isn't how you expected your life to turn out…"

At that, JJ did open his eyes, turning over on his side so that he was face-to-face with his wife. He could just make out her features in the moonlight filtering through the window above their bed. "What are you talking about, babe?" he asked. "I love my life."

"I know you do, but…" She sighed, gripping the front of his Toronto Maple Leafs T-shirt.

"But?"

"Never mind," she said, flipping over and pulling the blanket over herself. "Go to sleep. You have that thing tomorrow, right? That golf tournament?"

JJ frowned. He knew by now that whenever Isabella said "never mind" or something along those lines, something was bothering her. He sat up and reached over to turn on the bedside lamp.

"What is it?"

Isabella rolled over on her back. "It's nothing, really," she said. "It's just… Well, I know you said you were satisfied with the Olympic bronze –"

"Bella, we've been over this. Have you been reading the message boards again during your study breaks?"

"…maybe."

He had learned long ago that no good came from lurking on figure skating message boards, but Bella still had accounts on several of the most popular. Somehow, none of the members had ever realized that "JJ's Queen" was the real-life Isabella Yang-Leroy, a fact that rather amused JJ.

"What was it this time? Was another one of Yuri's Angels stirring up trouble again?" It wouldn't be the first time.

"No, it was just a silly prediction poll about who was going to win the gold in Beijing."

"Let me guess. Not-So-Little-Anymore Yuri won?"

Yuri Plisetsky had landed just off the podium in fourth place in Pyeongchang, although he shared in Russia's gold in the team event. Had he not been dealing with his ill-timed growth spurt and the media blitz that followed his amazing performance in the team event, JJ reckoned he would have strongly challenged Yuuri Katsuki for the gold. With silver medalist Viktor Nikiforov retiring for good after the Olympics and rumors floating around that Yuuri might follow after next season's Worlds in Japan, Yuri and Otabek were looking to be his biggest rivals for the next two years.

"No, you did," she said, JJ unable to hide his surprise – or his delight. He had yet to publicly announce his future plans, but he'd been fairly insistent that Pyeongchang would be his first and only Olympic experience as a participating athlete. Either the people who had voted for him in the poll had been unaware of that fact or they had chosen to ignore it, hoping he would change his mind.

"Really?"

She propped herself up on her elbow, placing her free hand on his knee. "Yes, and it just made me think about how incredible it would be to actually see you at the top of the podium in Beijing."

He sighed. "Bella…"

"Even if you didn't win, wouldn't it be an amazing experience for Aggie, to watch her _papa_ skate in the Olympics? She was so little in Pyeongchang. And I could teach her about her heritage in the country of her ancestors…"

"We don't need the excuse of the Olympics to take her to China," he pointed out. In fact, he was hoping to get Skate Canada and Cup of China as his two Grand Prix assignments next season. Isabella's beloved great-grandmother had been in too frail of health to make the long trip to Toronto for the wedding, so it would be wonderful to have the opportunity to visit her and introduce her to her great-great granddaughter.

"I know, but… You've already decided to compete until Montreal. Why not continue for another two years?"

"You know why."

"I can postpone starting law school for two years, JJ. I don't mind."

He shook his head. It wasn't the first time she had offered, but he was steadfast in his refusal. He already had his chance at his dream; now it was time for Isabella to reach hers. "I don't want to hold you back."

"And I don't want to hold _you_ back." She sat up, turning toward him and placing her hands on his cheeks. "Your dream was not a bronze medal. It was Olympic gold, and I know you can win it, babe. You're too good to retire at only twenty-two. It's such a waste of your God-given talent."

JJ wrapped his fingers around her wrists, bringing her hands down from his face just as a piercing cry crackled over the baby monitor on his nightstand.

On instinct, JJ turned to climb out of bed, but Isabella reached for his arm, stopping him. "It's okay. I'll check on her," she said, grabbing her robe from the foot of the bed and slipping it on over her nightshirt.

After he heard the door to the nursery close behind her, JJ got up as well, padding over to the dresser and pulling open the top drawer. There, he stored every single figure skating medal he had ever earned, starting from the silver he won at his first club competition to his most recent gold at Worlds. One day, when he and Isabella purchased their first house together, he planned to put all fifty or so of them on display, but space was at a premium in their current small two-bedroom apartment, especially with Aggie's arrival.

It didn't take him long to locate his Olympic bronze even in the dim lighting. His hand wrapped around the medal and pulled it out, his thumb tracing over the raised Olympic rings molded on the front, the same rings he had tattooed on his chest.

He would be lying if he said a part of him wasn't tempted to continue competing for the full quad. Isabella was right. He wasn't fully satisfied with the bronze, not when he probably would have won gold had he not fallen on his triple axel in the free. Four points – that was all that separated him and Yuuri. Four more points, and he would have been the Olympic champion, achieving his life-long dream and continuing his parents' legacy…

"She just needed a diaper change," Isabella said upon returning to their room. "Went right back to sl—JJ?"

Startled, JJ stuffed the medal back in the drawer and pushed it close.

"I knew it," she said, coming up behind him and wrapping her arms around his waist. Her head butted against his back. "You aren't happy with just the bronze."

He sighed. "The bronze is fine." There were plenty of skaters who would never even win that much. At least he had an Olympic medal – two, counting his team silver.

"But it isn't gold."

"I have enough gold," he insisted, turning around to face Isabella. "Especially the gold that really matters." He brought her hand to his mouth, kissing the gold wedding band adorning her finger. "You and Aurelia are more important to me than any medal."

"But –"

"Come on, let's go to bed."

He reached for her hand, but Isabella remained glued to her spot. "We haven't finished discussing this yet, JJ."

"It's almost midnight," he said, stifling another yawn. "Can we talk about this some other time?"

"Will you actually listen to me some other time?"

"What are you talking about? I listen to you all the time, babe." She arched an eyebrow. "Okay, most of the time," he amended. He did have a tendency to ignore her whenever he was watching hockey.

"Jean, sit down."

Though his body was crying out for sleep, he did as he was told, taking a seat on the edge of the mattress. Isabella moved to stand in front of him, lifting up his chin so that he was staring up at her.

"You really do want to continue until Beijing, don't you?" she asked. "And don't lie to me. I want your honest answer."

"Honestly?" His shoulders slumped. "In an ideal world, yes, of course I want another chance at the Olympics, but –"

She placed a finger on his lips. "Then don't give up on your dream. Law school can wait; the Olympics only come around every four years. You may say you're happy enough with your bronze now, but I don't want you to look back at your life in twenty years and resent the fact that you never won gold when we both know you're the best skater in the world."

"Bella, I –"

"And I'm not just saying all this because I love you and I want your dream to come true, either," she continued. "Of course that's a large part of it, but this isn't just about you, JJ. I _want_ to take a couple years off from school. I want to spend some time just being a mother to Aggie, and I want –" She bit down on her lip, pausing for a moment before admitting, "I want another baby."

"Another –?" His eyes widened, and he looked down at her stomach. "You aren't –?"

"No, not right now."

JJ sighed in relief. Not that he didn't want another kid, but Aggie wasn't even out of diapers yet. Besides, they had never really talked about having more children, not in concrete terms at least. He just assumed they would stick to their original plan of waiting until she finished law school and he retired from competition before even thinking of expanding their family.

"But I think we should try in a couple of years, when I'm close to finishing my undergraduate degree," Isabella said, placing her hands on his shoulders. "The timing will be good. I don't want to wait too long to give Aggie a little brother or sister, and I can focus on taking care of the kids while you focus on your skating and the Olympics."

JJ was silent, trying to take it all in. She really had given it a lot of thought, hadn't she? He had no idea she'd even thinking of having another baby.

Maybe it would be better to have another baby sooner, rather than later, though. He loved his younger brother and sister, but he always wished they were closer in age. His parents had put off having more children to tour in ice shows and compete in the occasional pro competition after his birth.

And despite his initial anxiety when he first learned Isabella was pregnant, he loved being a father, more than he ever imagined. If it were entirely up to him, they would have a whole hockey team of children.

The more JJ thought about it, the more he liked the idea. It really was a good plan, giving everybody what they wanted. His fingers rubbed over the area on his chest where the Olympic rings were inked into his skin underneath his shirt. He hadn't dared hope for another chance, but if Isabella truly wanted to take some time off from school to concentrate on being a mother…

"Babe? What do you think?" Isabella asked when he still hadn't responded to her idea. "We don't have to make any definite decisions about another baby right now. I know I kind of blindsided you about that, but even if we decide to wait, I still want to take time off before Aggie starts school."

"We'd have to find a bigger place," he finally said, falling out of his stupor. "This apartment is too small for a family of four. And Beijing _will_ be my final competition, even if I don't win gold. I don't want you to postpone your dream any longer than that."

Her eyes lit up. "Does that mean…?"

"Yes." JJ grinned, bringing her down for a kiss. "Yes to everything. Yes to your sabbatical, yes to one more Olympics, and yes to another baby."

DISCLAIMER: "Yuri On Ice" doesn't belong to me.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Aurelia means "golden" or "the golden one", which is why JJ refers to her as his "golden girl" in the lullaby he wrote for her.

That's it. I hope you enjoyed the story, and thanks for reading!


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